Giving Thanks

Thanksgiving was a wonderful time for me to reflect on the year. I look back on 2008 and still cannot believe what has happened in our lives. God has blessed our family in many ways and sitting around the table on Thanksgiving staring at my precious nephew I started to think about my blessings.

Hudson (my nephew), one of the dearest five-year-olds I know, led our conversation at the table. After the prayer, he wanted to share his Kindergarten worksheet on the story of Thanksgiving. Instead of reading it once, he wanted everyone at the table to take turns reading his work. So while we treated ourselves to Mom's delicious meal, the story was repeated multiple times around the table. It was precious, but Hudson wasn't finished yet! He quickly reminded us that we needed to share what we were thankful for this year.

As my family shared their blessings, I could feel the tears starting to stream down my face. I am extremely thankful for James and for this sweet little girl growing inside of me, but it was so painful to share that evening. I will always miss James and long to know him, but I am so thankful that God gave me the opportunity to carry him. He continues to strengthen my faith in the Lord and has taught me what kind of parent I want to be. (I will write more on that one later.)

I am also so blessed and thankful to carry this little girl. At the beginning of this pregnancy, my doubts and fears overwhelmed me (and sometimes still do). I had no idea how I would get this far in the pregnancy successfully. I am now 26 1/2 weeks and in the last week of my second trimester. The baby is in the 48th percentile in size (which is great), and I continue to maintain a stable blood pressure. Wade and I both are very thankful for this pregnancy and for this miraculous health.

Of course I am thankful for my loving husband and his patience, my parents, Wade's parents, our siblings, nephews, grandparents, extended families, and friends. The community of friends and family that surrounded us after James' death has meant so much to us and given us amazing support and hope.

This morning I pulled out the basket and started to reread the cards and letters we received last spring and summer. My favorite part of the day last April, May, and June was receiving the mail. The first couple of weeks, Wade would bring me the cards when he came home for lunch, because I did not feel like going outside. Gradually, I started making the trip to the mailbox my daily outing. Reading those letters and cards filled my heart with hope and love. Just knowing that others around us were praying for our family was so comforting. When Wade would get home for lunch, we would read the cards again and cry together. Then I would add the new cards to the basket.

We received cards from church members, colleagues, various students I taught over the last seven years, current students, students from OHS I haven't taught, our former teachers, old friends, new friends, our parents' friends and colleagues, neighbors and of course family members. We truly felt loved! Throughout the summer, I would pull out the basket and begin to reread those dear notes. Even now they continue to give me inspiration and hope, and just this week we have received some new cards. We are so blessed to have such devoted friends and family in our lives, and we are extremely thankful.

Thanksgiving has a whole new meaning to us this year. We will continue to count our blessings and thank God for the gifts in our lives, especially James and this growing baby girl.